There’s a Method to Our Madness

 We have  just about arrived at the end of our homeschool year.  Although we will pick up the books again in July, my mind and soul are relieved and ready for a break.  The last few school days have been frustrating – I can see the children’s minds wandering as I try to focus them on just a little more history or maybe a little more math practice.  It is at these times that I can easily slip back into “Why on earth are we doing this homeschooling thing again?  Wouldn’t it be so much easier to send them off to school?  I mean, the schools around here are actually highly-rated schools, right?”  When things aren’t going well or when I worry that I may not be doing enough, it’s easy for the doubts and fears to creep in.

It is at these times that I find it helpful to write down the list of reasons why my husband and I decided to homeschool our kids.  You don’t homeschool because it sounds like a fun idea.  You don’t homeschool because everyone else is doing it.  You don’t homeschool because you think it will automatically make your kids academic superstars.  Choosing to homeschool for those reasons is like choosing chocolate over vanilla.  You can and will change your mind at any time.  No, you must have valid, deep-seeded reasons that resonate with your heart and beliefs to stick it out for the long-term.  I wrote down a long list last night and would like to share a few of these reasons here.   Let me just say, although I am sure that many others have the same or similar reasons for choosing this path, these reasons in no way apply to everyone.  I am not better than you, or more patient than you, because I chose to homeschool.  If your children attend school, I know that as a loving, cautious parent, you made that decision carefully and with great thought to your child’s well-being and education.  Maybe these reasons will help you understand why homeschooling is working for our family.

1.  We homeschool because I’m basically out of my mind and love being home with my children 24-7 and relish the thought that their education lies solely on my shoulders.

Ha, I had to start out with that one because it is impossible to homeschool without a good sense of humor.  And honestly, I don’t always want to be with my kids, and it freaks me out sometimes that I don’t have another teacher to blame  when the kids don’t seem to be “getting it.”  When my husband had first suggested homeschooling for our oldest, I immediately said no.  I had been looking forward to sending the kids to school for quite a while.  It took me quite some time (and a lot of work by the Holy Spirit, no doubt!) to even consider homeschooling.

2.  We homeschool because we want our kids to love learning and to become lifelong learners.

As a former teacher, my heart would go out to my students who were constantly bored in my classes.  I couldn’t stimulate them or challenge them further since I was too busy trying to help the students that were lagging behind.  Eventually, those bright students who had finished their work early every day stopped trying so hard.  They gave up.  Learning was no longer interesting or fun to them.  They did just enough to get by, and they were the ones that you would hear at lunchtime complaining about how much they hated school.  I don’t want my kids to hate learning.  I want them to seek more knowledge and learn how to find out more information on their own.  Homeschooling provides the perfect environment for that.  Just last week, I was reading to the kids about life in the New World for history.  I could see by their faces that they were not the slightest bit interested in that book.  So I put it away, and we set off to the library to find better books on that same topic.  Now they can’t wait for history time!  It is my desire and my hope for my kids that some day, as adults, they will still be seeking out learning. This will drive them to be more helpful to their families, to be better at their jobs, and to be more content with life.

3.  We homeschool because I want to cultivate deep relationships with each of my children, and I want them to have the same kind of relationship with each other as well.

Homeschooling allows me to have a lot more interaction with the offspring.  I get to connect with each one of them as they discover new and exciting things.  We also get the chance to work on character issues and attitudes as soon as they crop up.  A few months ago, I noticed that my three oldest were having a difficult time getting along.  They were saying cruel, cutting words and excluding each other from their activities.  I set the school books aside, and we spent a full day focusing on building back up these relationships with each other.  I heard Gabi reciting to herself this morning “How good and how pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!” after she didn’t get her way.

4.  We homeschool because I want my kids to see that learning comes through all experiences of life, not just a classroom.

It is easiest and most natural for a child to learn when he is just observing the things around him and asking questions.  With homeschooling, I can be attentive to that and be ready to answer his questions.  If I don’t have an answer, I can show him how to find the answer for himself.  This will equip him for learning for life.  A book I recently read put it this way – “Our vision of education is:  the way of living by which children can become who they are.” (Homeschooling: A Family’s Journey by Gregory and Martine Millman, p. 123)  As a former teacher, it is still hard for me to break out of the “classroom mode,” but I am seeing that time spent in the kitchen with Mom or time spent with Dad working in the backyard helps our kids learn mathematics, science, vocabulary, order, chemistry, and more.  Learning takes place in the conversation at the dinner table.  Learning takes place in the minivan on the way to Grandma’s house.  Homeschooling doesn’t happen from 8 am to 3 pm.  It is happening all the time.

5.  We homeschool because our desire is for our kids to continuously improve themselves, not try to keep up with their peers.

This is especially important to me as our son David is autistic.  He is doing quite well in learning to read, better than I thought he would.  However, he is nowhere close to being at the same level as his peers.  The advantage of homeschooling in this case is that David is completely unaware of this fact.  He is excited and pleased at every inch of progress he makes, instead of being disheartened that he can never quite match up to the others in his grade.  On the flip side, my oldest is one of those kids that hears things once and gets it instantly.  She is probably miles ahead of her peers.  Homeschooling is fantastic because I can encourage her to keep going and excel in all that she does.  If she were at school, however, she would be tempted to hang back so as to blend in more with her classmates.  She would stop trying so hard so that she wouldn’t stand out.  Grades and ages do not define where my kids should be at an academic level.

There are many more reasons that we chose this amazing and sometimes difficult path of homeschooling.  These are the ones that encouraged me most to keep at it.  I am excited to see what adventures lie ahead in our next year of homeschooling.

…linking up today at Raising Mighty Arrows…